The Brave Companions

Below is what we had to do for my English IV Mid-term.

Objective:  Write a short-story using 3 characters from literature discussed in class and insert them into the setting of a popular movie. 

Characters:

• Beowulf   (main character of the epic poem ‘Beowulf’)
• Grendel   (a monster that Beowulf defeats)
• The Monk (one of the pilgrims from Chaucer’s “Canterbury Tales”)

Movie:  Lord of the Rings

(I thought my story was pretty entertaining at the least, so here it is.)

The Brave Companions

       Despite being in the summer months, it was another unseasonably cold day in the city of Rivendell.  The dawn of a new day in the Elvish capitol was famous; being the subject of both flowery songs to children’s tales, but one would be hard-pressed to find a singer that could make this particular morning any less dark and dreary.
       Not only in Rivendell was the air filled with a chilled evilness.  Every nation within Middle Earth could not dispute sensing something, whether it be death, danger, or fear, in their midst.  The young, naive populous of middle Earth thought of this phenomenon as only a shift in the weather pattern, but the older, seasoned men of the kingdom knew better.  War was coming.
       There hadn’t been a war in Middle Earth in centuries, therefore only a select few could sense its presence.  Luckily, Elrond, the leader of the Elves, was of these few, having served in the previous Great War of Middle Earth when the combined might of the Elves, Dwarves, and of Man drove the evil Grendel and his horde out of the lands of the few and into the dark lands of Mordor.  Elrond was the first to note the similarities between the previous Great War and how middle Earth was right at that moment.
       Elrond, fearful of what power Grendel could muster from behind the Black Mountain in Mordor, decided to hold a war-time council with the leaders of every distinct allied race in Middle Earth: the Elves, the Dwarves, and the race of Man.
       First to arrive was Humbaba, son of Gunthar.  He was a giant of a man, standing over eight feet tall.  The common-fok of the land nicknamed him “The Mountain that Rides” because of the legend that he held a reward for any man that could provide him with a horse large enough for him to ride, although it is said that he paid a man a treasure fit for a king after he presented him with an African rhinoceros.  Humbaba was truly a man of legendary status, known to have slain many terrible beasts and monsters in his time.  Elrond was wise for inviting Humbaba, because any man that often wields the trunks of trees when he breaks the tip of his sword is a top candidate for fighting evil.
       Accompanying Humbaba was a man by the name of The Monk.  A fat and jolly man, The Monk has been a companion of Humbaba since he discovered him fighting in the gladiator pits of The Shire, when Humbaba was given the title of “Humbaba the Hobbit Slayer”.  From that day onward, The Monk has been officially Humbaba’s spiritual guide, although unofficially he was known as Humbaba’s fight promoter, profiting off of every foe Humbaba put to the ground.  The Monk puts his wealth to great use, buying himself the finest silks and expanding his immense girth with fine food and wine.  With a large stomach and a bald head, The Monk almost sticks out of the crowd as much as his counter-part, Humbaba.
       “Are we there yet?  We must be there, right Baba?”
       “Shut your hold, Monk.” said Humbaba, which was his response for the past ten times The Monk had asked.
       When Humbaba finally did arrive in Rivendell, he was met with a thunderous applause.  Flower petals were swirling in the wind, and a brass band was playing his fight-song “Humbaba the Burninator”.  Humbaba, being pleased at such a greeting, thought it best to park his rhino outside of the city walls, so it would not destroy anything like the last time he brought it to a village.
       “Ah! Humbaba! Why, you’re late! I’ve never known you to be tardy!” exclaimed Elrond from the balcony of the City Hall.
       “Well, I wouldn’t have been late if I didn’t have to fight all those armed men on the road.”, explained Humbaba.
       “Armed men? Were they headed in this direction?”
       “Aye they were.  A lot of them.  I had to fight an old wizard, an Elvish archer, and a feisty Dwarven fellow.  You’re welcome for getting rid of the likes of them.”
       A wave of shock went through the crowd gathered there, and was visible on the face of Elrond.
       “Could this man have truly disposed of Gandalf the wizard, Gimili of the Dwarves, and Legolas of the Elves?  But they were going to be his comrades!” thought Elrond to himself.
       “Well, we have a task of you, Humbaba.” said Elrond after taking a few moments to grasp the situation.
       “We need you to destroy the evil Lord Grendel, because I am sure of it that he is going to be on the warpath soon.  It seems that he is amassing an army to find his precious One Ring, and will burn the whole of Middle Earth to find it.”
       A troubled look washed over the face of both Humbaba and The Monk.  After a quick discussion between the two, The Monk stepped forward.
       “Well, what would you say if I told you that we….found this One Ring he is looking for.”
       “What!?  What could you mean? Do you mean to tell me that you actually have the One Ring? But that’s preposterous!  The One Ring has been in Mordor for centuries!  How did you obtain such a thing?”
      ”Well, we hard of the worth of such a ring, so we thought we’d go and git it.” said an embarrassed Monk.
       “You went to Mordor and simply took their most precious artifact?”
       “We didn’t really take it, per se, but rather won it….after killing everyone guarding it.”
       Another wave of chock and awe shot through the crowd and their leader.  Has Humbaba truly already destroyed the evil that he was summoned here to destroy?
       “Well, then you defeated Lord Grendel?” asked Elrond.
       “No.  He wasn’t there when we took it.  Lucky us, eh?”
       “I see, well it seems that we still have a talk of you.  We request of you, The Monk, and of you, Humbaba, to destroy Lord Grendel and spare us from him tyranny forever more.”
       After hearing the assignment, Humbaba and The Monk immediately sped off towards the dark lands of Mordor to face their foe.  After a full day of riding, the Gates of Mordor were before them.
       Brandishing the One Ring to the end of a long rope, Humbaba began to swing the rope in long circles around him to taunt his foe out of hiding.  Grendel, immediately sensing the spiritual pressure radiating from his long lost ring, sprang from his throne to claim what was his.
       Humbaba now got his first glance at the terrible Lord Grendel.  A horrible sight, Grendel was more beast than man.  With scales covering every inch of the creature’s form, large protruding fangs, and an indescribable odor about him, Grendel was a horrifying image.  Grendel was the one true evil of Middle Earth, being the cause of every Great War since the Dawn of Man.  Children were threatened with a visit from Grendel when they didn’t eat their vegetables, and adults were threatened with living with him if they weren’t religiously faithful.  Nothing could be more evil, more sinister, that way Humbaba saw before him.  Nothing could promise a better fight that these two forces of good and evil.
       With a flash of steel, Humbaba was on the attack; his greatsword piercing the thick scales on Grendel’s neck.  But, astonishingly, the savage strike did not harm the creature.
       “Is that all you got, Warrior?” said Grendel in a guttural rasp.
       “Want more, Beast?”
       The right foot of Humbaba suddenly came crashing into the chest of Grendel, thoroughly knocking both the wind and his lunch out of him.  The next thing that came into the blurred vision of Lord Grendel was the point of Humbaba’s sword at his throat, and the distinct trace of bloodlust in the warrior’s eyes.

.

       Humbaba and The Monk returned to Rivendell to see an even greater welcoming party then before, including jesters, snake-charmers, gypsies selling jewelry, and at the center, a grand banquet with Elrond seated at the head of the table. 
       “Splendid!  Our brave companions have returned! Come and sit! You must be weary from your journey.”
       “Yeah, that sounds great and all, but what about our reward?” said The Monk, with his most devilish smile.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

So, like it?
I don’t know….I had fun with it.
It was only supposed to be between 2 and 3 pages, but how the hell can you introduce characters, the setting, and have any sort of plot in only 2-3 double-spaced pages!?!

And before any crazy LoTR fans bash in my door, calm down guys.
This story is only very loosely based on the Lord of The Rings universe.
“How the fuck did he get a rhino from Africa!?!  That place didn’t even exist!!!”
Exactly.